for Matt

[tohearthesound]

Rache has been doing quite a bit of thinking since the last time he saw Matt; it was more productive than he expected. On the other hand, it left him unable to go any further without first talking to Matt again.

Which brings him to his seat at the bar tonight. No drink, no food; he's a little busy watching the room at the moment, but maybe later.

Comments

[semicharmed]

"This ..."

Matt's fingers knead down, still on either side of his spine.

"Is a whole practice, back on my world. People use it to relieve tension, sometimes for physical therapy and sometimes ... just because it feels good. I am, at best, an amateur."

[tohearthesound]

"Oh."

The word is nearly swallowed by a fresh groan.

"You're an excellent amateur."

[semicharmed]

"I try," Matt assures him, "really hard."



(He really does want to tell him.

How patient does he have to be before it's patient enough?)

[tohearthesound]

Rache chuckles, adding something that sounds like "succeed admirably" before he presses a kiss just under Matt's jaw.

[semicharmed]

Matt sighs, shifting to entangle their legs a little further. (This entails nudging his calf more or less between Rache's legs.)

His fingers keep moving down his back, digging in and relaxing.

He tilts his head to kiss him again.

[tohearthesound]

All of these are extremely pleasing developments.

Rache leans in to meet him halfway, his hand scraping up between his shoulder blades.

[semicharmed]

Matt's pleased by them himself.

He's very pleased by how much closer he feels to him now, chest to chest and thigh to thigh and kissing him-- the sheer relief in it.

[tohearthesound]

Rache's sense of urgency ebbs, his kisses turning slow and lazy.

(There's no need to hurry. Matt isn't going anywhere, and oh if his heart doesn't ache knowing that.)

[semicharmed]

Matt murmurs his approval against his lips. His hands aren't massaging anymore so much as stroking up and down Rache's back, clutching occasionally at his shoulder or his hip.

[tohearthesound]

Rache nips at Matt's mouth, teeth barely grazing.

He moves one leg idly, just enjoying the feel of it brushing against Matt's.

[semicharmed]

The wants Matt has are rapidly shifting.

He wants Rache. He still wants him very much-- but with this change of pace, and the tangent of massages, he experiences a brief, sharp yearning to stay curled up with him here for hours and talk about absolutely nothing and fall asleep when the sun rises.


... Oh God.

He's a cliche.

[tohearthesound]

Rache would be entirely amenable to this cliche.

As it is, he mouths over Matt's throat before tucking his head beneath Matt's jaw.

He could use a moment to catch his breath.

[semicharmed]

Matt wraps his arms around him, grip tightening to a hug.

[tohearthesound]

His fingers curl against Matt's skin.

He wants to say something; he's just not sure what.



Eventually, he settles on,

"Thank you.

For being here."

[semicharmed]

"Any time," Matt murmurs.

Then he pauses; all the air seems to leave his lungs.

Say it or don't say it.

(Rache may feel him go a little tense.)

[tohearthesound]

(It's hard to miss, close as they are.)

Softer still and faintly worried:

"Matt?"

[semicharmed]

"I'm fine," he replies immediately, trying to ease his breathing.


"But I think I should tell you ..."

[tohearthesound]

Rache doesn't relax in the slightest.

"Tell me what?"

[semicharmed]

Matt feels like he pauses for a long, long time.





"I love you. I'm in love with you."

[tohearthesound]

"Say that again? Please?"

He's shaking, though he doesn't realize it.

[semicharmed]

Matt can feel it, though.

"I said I'm in love with you," he repeats, as gently as he can.

Oh, God help him.

"I think-- I wasn't going to say anything, but I thought, before we ...

I just thought you should know that."

[tohearthesound]

(Love is an abstract, Rache thinks.

Love is in poems and novels and plays.

Love is for other people

Love is for people.


Or, it was.)

"Oh."

He laughs, high and startled and perhaps a little choked with the threat of tears.

"That's...that's good, it is, you can't know...

Because I think I am, I have been, um....in love with you too, so...

Yes."

[semicharmed]

"Oh," Matt exhales.

His arms tighten around him, lips pressing against his hair.

"Oh, Rache. I didn't know."

He thought he had to time it right, to avoid stressing him out. Somehow what Rache felt about him-- how could he have not thought about it?

[tohearthesound]

He smiles shakily.

"If it helps, I'm not sure that I knew, for a while?"

But he thinks he knows when he did.

(Take me instead.)

[semicharmed]

Matt kisses his head, squeezing him tighter for a moment before his arms relax.

"That ... makes a lot of sense," he notes, rueful.

"I've been a mess lately. In case you hadn't noticed."